tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1104339745435113982.post1993735921511025704..comments2023-04-30T08:42:16.270-07:00Comments on Bill and Judy Farley: Disappearing Marriage!Bill and Judy Farleyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15651109827294789027noreply@blogger.comBlogger4125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1104339745435113982.post-79491849166092605602011-07-29T16:22:35.828-07:002011-07-29T16:22:35.828-07:00In response to the anonymous comment March 24th:
I...In response to the anonymous comment March 24th:<br />I agree that this is an issue within the church, and it's not right that Christian young ladies often expect more from a young man than is realistic. I discovered awhile back that I even had that problem (good thing God changed that BEFORE I fell for my "Mr. Right", because my husband is not perfect and I was able to go into our relationship without expecting him to be). But I don’t think this is so much about the guy himself (assuming he is mature and godly with a good career, etc) as it is an issue of Christian women’s standards not being quite where they should be. While trying to not have their standards too low, I think a lot of young Christian women inadvertently set them too high. As Dave once said in a sermon on this topic, "You can't expect him to be a John Piper or a Bill Farley or a CJ Mahaney-- he's 23!" (I'm paraphrasing, but you get the idea). There are definitely certain qualities that are necessary in a good, Godly husband, I'm not trying to diminish that, but it's important to set one's standards in this area at the right level.<br /> As it relates to the article we’re commenting on, men are not the whole problem, and I don’t think Bill was suggesting that they are. I think he was simply stating that lack of strong male leadership is a big part of the problem, which it is. Also, as I understand it (Bill, correct me if I’m wrong) he was talking more of the decline of marriage in secular culture than in the church (though it’s a problem in the church, as well). <br />Bottom line, men are not the whole problem, and neither are women. We are all a mess, we all contribute to the problem, and Christ is the only solution.Katie Hnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1104339745435113982.post-14888367349228558672011-03-27T17:43:51.607-07:002011-03-27T17:43:51.607-07:00"A diminished role for men and marriage in so..."A diminished role for men and marriage in society" has probably come about by our culture idolizing that role to begin with, to the point that women felt they needed to fulfill all the traditional male roles to achieve self-worth and identity. So women have pursued education and careers with great gusto and have made progress in those endeavors, sacrificing the often all-consuming call of motherhood in various ways, whether by having no children, fewer children or paying others to care for the children. Stay-at-home moms give the prime years of their lives to raising children and making a home. Wives are called to support their husbands in their external/public calling and domain, which gives them less time to develop their own talents or to serve in a more public way. The virtues necessary to serve others in hidden ways for no economic or status gain requires steadfast faith in the God who promises reward for what is done in secret, the reward being the furthering of God's kingdom, not a woman's status or finances! But our culture so greatly values things like independence, status, wealth acquisition, identity-as-giftedness that it is is getting more difficult for women to choose a mostly private life at home, investing herself in husband, children and others with no guarantees of fruitfulness. It's kind of like the argument against putting all one's eggs in one basket...it feels risky, and, in fact, it is risky. Another reason why our identity must be 100% in Christ, not in what we accomplish whether as public or private persona.Cvancarahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13293323801717609348noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1104339745435113982.post-44263137574211942152011-03-24T14:06:04.998-07:002011-03-24T14:06:04.998-07:00I remember when you provided this information at V...I remember when you provided this information at Veritas several weeks ago. I generally agree with your conclusions but do not think they are true across the board, especially in our church. I think that young single men at our church are doing and have done a decent job at pursuing godly young women. However, I know of several instances within the last year or two in which around half a dozen godly, stable young men have been denied even one date with a young lady they are attempting to pursue. I feel that this is more of the problem leading other young men to not pursue women in the church. We have some incredible single guys at GCF, who all have good personalities, careers, and spiritual lives, who are simply not given a chance. What else does a young lady expect from at 21 to 27-year-old man?Anonymous member of GCFnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1104339745435113982.post-13017616262901285872011-01-27T18:41:21.999-08:002011-01-27T18:41:21.999-08:00Hi Pastor Bill,
Very interesting post. I do not un...Hi Pastor Bill,<br />Very interesting post. I do not understand the last paragraph though. Maybe mispellings (where/were)?Chris Fricknoreply@blogger.com